Act While Trusting / Based on 1 Samuel 17:19-49 / Delivered on June 24, 2018 to CCH

Act While Trusting / Based on 1 Samuel 17:19-49 / Delivered on June 24, 2018 to CCH

Hymns: Trust and Obey, We Are Called to Be God’s People, I Then Shall Live

1 Samuel 17:19-49

17:19 Now Saul, and they, and all the men of Israel, were in the valley of Elah, fighting with the Philistines.

17:20 David rose early in the morning, left the sheep with a keeper, took the provisions, and went as Jesse had commanded him. He came to the encampment as the army was going forth to the battle line, shouting the war cry.

17:21 Israel and the Philistines drew up for battle, army against army.

17:22 David left the things in charge of the keeper of the baggage, ran to the ranks, and went and greeted his brothers.

17:23 As he talked with them, the champion, the Philistine of Gath, Goliath by name, came up out of the ranks of the Philistines, and spoke the same words as before. And David heard him.

17:32 David said to Saul, "Let no one's heart fail because of him; your servant will go and fight with this Philistine."

17:33 Saul said to David, "You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him; for you are just a boy, and he has been a warrior from his youth."

17:34 But David said to Saul, "Your servant used to keep sheep for his father; and whenever a lion or a bear came, and took a lamb from the flock,

17:35 I went after it and struck it down, rescuing the lamb from its mouth; and if it turned against me, I would catch it by the jaw, strike it down, and kill it.

17:36 Your servant has killed both lions and bears; and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be like one of them, since he has defied the armies of the living God."

17:37 David said, "The LORD, who saved me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear, will save me from the hand of this Philistine." So Saul said to David, "Go, and may the LORD be with you!"

17:38 Saul clothed David with his armor; he put a bronze helmet on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail.

17:39 David strapped Saul's sword over the armor, and he tried in vain to walk, for he was not used to them. Then David said to Saul, "I cannot walk with these; for I am not used to them." So David removed them.

17:40 Then he took his staff in his hand, and chose five smooth stones from the wadi, and put them in his shepherd's bag, in the pouch; his sling was in his hand, and he drew near to the Philistine.

17:41 The Philistine came on and drew near to David, with his shield-bearer in front of him.

17:42 When the Philistine looked and saw David, he disdained him, for he was only a youth, ruddy and handsome in appearance.

17:43 The Philistine said to David, "Am I a dog, that you come to me with sticks?" And the Philistine cursed David by his gods.

17:44 The Philistine said to David, "Come to me, and I will give your flesh to the birds of the air and to the wild animals of the field."

17:45 But David said to the Philistine, "You come to me with sword and spear and javelin; but I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.

17:46 This very day the LORD will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down and cut off your head; and I will give the dead bodies of the Philistine army this very day to the birds of the air and to the wild animals of the earth, so that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel,

17:47 and that all this assembly may know that the LORD does not save by sword and spear; for the battle is the Lord's and he will give you into our hand."

17:48 When the Philistine drew nearer to meet David, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet the Philistine.

17:49 David put his hand in his bag, took out a stone, slung it, and struck the Philistine on his forehead; the stone sank into his forehead, and he fell face down on the ground.

Good morning to you!  I am Darci Strutt McQuiston, a Lay Servant from the United Methodist Church up on the hill, and it is my privilege to be with you here today. 

The scripture today is probably a familiar one to many of you.  It is the story of David and Goliath.  I’m hoping we can apply the wisdom of David in our own lives today.

Some of the wisdom I’m calling out is:
Developing your talent
Being yourself
Acting while trusting

Developing your talent
David wasn’t picking up a stone and sling for the first time that day.  He had developed skill with those tools over time.

17:34 But David said to Saul, "Your servant used to keep sheep for his father; and whenever a lion or a bear came, and took a lamb from the flock,

17:35 I went after it and struck it down, rescuing the lamb from its mouth; and if it turned against me, I would catch it by the jaw, strike it down, and kill it.

David was the youngest and so the low job of tending sheep had fallen on him.  He was a son, not just a hired hand, so took his responsibility seriously.  Seriously enough he was willing to risk his life for his sheep.  During his years as a shepherd he had become quite good with his weapons of sling and staff.  He had also learned how to perform well in the face of fear.

Acting as a shepherd wasn’t a glamorous job but it was an important job.  It doesn’t say he did, but I can imagine David practicing with his sling until he gained the confidence needed to protect the sheep from animals like lion and bear.

Being yourself

David had confidence in himself even when King Saul did not.

17:33 Saul said to David, "You are not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him; for you are just a boy, and he has been a warrior from his youth."

Even though David didn’t fit Saul’s image as a brave fighter he tried to turn him into one.

17:38 Saul clothed David with his armor; he put a bronze helmet on his head and clothed him with a coat of mail.
17:39 David strapped Saul's sword over the armor, and he tried in vain to walk, for he was not used to them. Then David said to Saul, "I cannot walk with these; for I am not used to them." So David removed them.
17:40 Then he took his staff in his hand, and chose five smooth stones from the wadi, and put them in his shepherd's bag, in the pouch; his sling was in his hand, and he drew near to the Philistine.

Saul tried to make David into a warrior.  That wasn’t who David was.  He let Saul dress him and then tried to fit into the model of a warrior, but he had the wisdom to know that model didn’t fit.  He was a shepherd.  He was secure in his belief that being a shepherd was enough.

Acting while trusting

17:44 The Philistine said to David, "Come to me, and I will give your flesh to the birds of the air and to the wild animals of the field."
17:45 But David said to the Philistine, "You come to me with sword and spear and javelin; but I come to you in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.
17:46 This very day the LORD will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down and cut off your head; and I will give the dead bodies of the Philistine army this very day to the birds of the air and to the wild animals of the earth, so that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel,
17:47 and that all this assembly may know that the LORD does not save by sword and spear; for the battle is the Lord's and he will give you into our hand."

David trusted God would win this battle.  He trusted but he also acted on that trust.

17:48 When the Philistine drew nearer to meet David, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet the Philistine.

David had developed his talent, he saw his skill combined with God’s power to be enough for the situation, and he acted on that trust.  The armies on both sides probably doubted his ability to survive, yet in the end he was the victor.

17:49 David put his hand in his bag, took out a stone, slung it, and struck the Philistine on his forehead; the stone sank into his forehead, and he fell face down on the ground.

I see this scripture as an invitation to look at ourselves a bit differently.  We each have talents.  We don’t have the same talents as others but that doesn’t mean our talents aren’t important.  There are other places in scripture that more directly state we are expected to develop the talents we are given. 

David embraced his talents and become an expert.  Being a shepherd wasn’t a cool job, but it was who he was, and he made sure he was good at it.  In this scripture, David used his talent in a way that was different from how he had originally prepared for it to be used.  He didn’t sit on the sidelines and think, “Gosh I wish a warrior would step up to this task.”  He saw his talent and applied it to this situation.  David saw his ability to fight lions and bears as equal to this task.  He brought who he was to do the work he felt called to do.

In just over a week we are celebrating our Independence Day.  This brought to mind two other people that developed talents and used their skill for a different purpose.  The two people I thought of were Betsy Ross and Francis Scott Key.

Betsy Ross and her husband ran an upholstery business.  She was a seamstress not a fighter.  She used her talents to repair uniforms and make tents with other women of the time and created our nation’s first flag that inspired the troops to win freedom for our United States.  She was a warrior with a sewing needle.

Francis Scott Key was a lawyer and a poet.  He wrote the poem we now claim as our national anthem in 1812 after seeing the flag still flying after a night of fighting.  His song makes our hearts swell with pride still today.  He was a warrior with a pen and paper.

A seamstress and a poet have done more to win battles than you’d think possible! 

Perhaps we need to look at what we can do in different ways.  Think about what talents you have and what life experiences you can share. God doesn’t ask us to become anyone else but our best selves.  A quote by Oscar Wilde I love is, “Be yourself.  Everyone else is already taken.”  It reminds me that it is good to have role models but, in the end, it is important to develop into the best “you” you can be.

We are asked to trust God, but also to do our part.  We are each unique members of the body of Christ.  Our talent is needed.  Do not compare your gift to what others can give.  Be willing to bring your best self in service to God, and giants will fall.

Amen

Caring Comes First / Based on 1 Corinthians 12:27-13:13 and 2 Corinthians 4:13-5:1 / Delivered to Hudson-UMC on June 10, 2018

Caring Comes First / Based on 1 Corinthians 12:27-13:13 and 2 Corinthians 4:13-5:1 / Delivered to Hudson-UMC on June 10, 2018  Dementia Awareness Sunday

Hymns: Help us Accept Each Other, Just As I Am, I’ll Fly Away

Children’s Sermon: I had several different containers with a quarter in them; a spice jar, a little pouch from Mexico, a cleaned used Keurig pod, a tiny Tupperware container, a medicine bottle, and a large cloth.  As I revealed each quarter I asked how much it was worth.  Of course, it was always worth 25 cents no matter the contain.  I explained our bodies are like those containers.  Some are big, some are small, some need medicine, and some have been used up and feel broken.  Yet within each of us is the spirit of a child of God and the value is just the same.

1Co 12:27 You are the body of Christ and parts of each other. 28 In the church, God has appointed first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of healing, the ability to help others, leadership skills, different kinds of tongues. 29 All aren't apostles, are they? All aren't prophets, are they? All aren't teachers, are they? All don't perform miracles, do they? 30 All don't have gifts of healing, do they? All don't speak in different tongues, do they? All don't interpret, do they? 31 Use your ambition to try to get the greater gifts. And I'm going to show you an even better way. 13:1 If I speak in tongues of human beings and of angels but I don't have love, I'm a clanging gong or a clashing cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and I know all the mysteries and everything else, and if I have such complete faith that I can move mountains but I don't have love, I'm nothing. 3 If I give away everything that I have and hand over my own body to feel good about what I've done but I don't have love, I receive no benefit whatsoever. 4 Love is patient, love is kind, it isn't jealous, it doesn't brag, it isn't arrogant, 5 it isn't rude, it doesn't seek its own advantage, it isn't irritable, it doesn't keep a record of complaints, 6 it isn't happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. 7 Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails. As for prophecies, they will be brought to an end. As for tongues, they will stop. As for knowledge, it will be brought to an end. 9 We know in part and we prophesy in part; 10 but when the perfect comes, what is partial will be brought to an end. 11 When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, reason like a child, think like a child. But now that I have become a man, I've put an end to childish things. 12 Now we see a reflection in a mirror; then we will see face-to-face. Now I know partially, but then I will know completely in the same way that I have been completely known. 13 Now faith, hope, and love remain—these three things—and the greatest of these is love.

This Sunday is set apart as Dementia Awareness Sunday.  There are 5.7 million Americans living with Alzheimer’s and 110 thousand in Wisconsin.  It is the sixth leading cause of death.  Rev Dawn invited me into the pulpit not because I’m good at researching statistics, but because my husband and I are living the dementia journey.  It is my hope to bring you a message of the power of caring, understanding, acceptance, love, and strength.  It will be part testimonial, part informational, and part preaching from scripture.

My hubby’s name is Mike, but I call him McQ.  Our official start on this path was the spring of 2014.  We sat in the office of a neurologist at the May Clinic in Rochester and heard him say his diagnosis was mental decline due to probably early onset of Alzheimer’s disease.  I had been aware something wasn’t right since 2010 and we visited multiple doctors to find something we could cure.  The answer four years later was that there was nothing we could cure.  My mind raced and when I asked what we should do next the doctor’s instructions were short; get your legal paperwork in order, stay active mentally-socially-physically, and buy the book on Alzheimer’s Disease in the clinic book store.  That was it.

I was full of emotion after I left that room.  McQ’s response was denial.  That combination between us made those early days very hard.  McQ felt it wasn’t true and I felt it wasn’t fair.

I was angry at God for this cruel stealing of our dreams.  I cried and argued and pleaded and complained in prayer.  I had been a servant in the church from my youth.  When I was too old to attend Sunday School I taught it.  I became a church choir director when I was 21 in Prairie du Chien.  When I came to Hudson I immediately was active in the music ministry.  After taking Disciple Bible study I taught it for eight years and led other studies.  I became a Lay Speaker and then Lay Leader of the church.  I screamed at God – I work hard for you!  We don’t deserve this! 

The summer of 2014 happened to be the summer Pastor Bruce took extended time away.  Somehow through conflicts in schedules I was in the pulpit four times in two months.  I preached every two weeks.  Kathy needed information for the next Sunday two weeks in advance, so I was prepping for the next sermon before I even delivered the current one.  I knew this was a God thing.  Focusing on our diagnosis brought me pain.  God invited me to focus on His word and serving His people instead.  I still had all the emotions but the relationship between God and I was strengthened. 

Meanwhile McQ retired after 32 years at 3M.  It was a little earlier than we had planned but they bridged Social Security until he qualified for disability.  I had moved into a new job at US Bank in the end of 2013 and had proven myself trustworthy and capable so was able to work from home starting the fall of 2014.  That worked until the role of caregiver became larger than I could handle along with working at my corporate job.  I left my job at the end of March in 2017 and changed my LinkedIn title to Chief Helpmate of Mike McQuiston.

From 2014 on I’ve read all I could find on dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease specifically.  Dementia is an umbrella term and Alzheimer’s Disease is the most common form but not the only form.  It is what we were handed so what I have focused on.  I have also studied all I can on caregiving.  I have studied but let me give the average disclaimer here – I am not a medical professional.  What I’m sharing is based on books, listening to YouTube training videos, and reading what other caregivers share in online support groups.  I was helped greatly by our county’s Aging and Disability Resource Center staff.  Some of you listened to Tara when she did a presentation at our church some time ago, and Nancy has spoken here as well from that organization.

To be a caregiver is different from someone who provides the service of medical care.  It is a different form of the word “care”.  Caring about the person comes before caring for them.  The doctor that told me to go buy a book, when I asked what to do now, was not a caregiver.  He was a person giving medical “care” but not necessarily showing care.

I am McQ’s primary caregiver, but we need more people to understand and be secondary caregivers for us to walk this dementia journey successfully.   For that reason, I hope to help you understand more about the journey we’re on.  I’m counting on you caring.

Alzheimer’s is often called a memory problem.  If you read the article in the newspaper this week with Rev Dawn and Vicki you know that is not quite accurate.  Alzheimer’s is an illness that causes brain death.  That does affect memory, but it also affects much more.

The ability to process vision decreases.  As the disease progresses the field of vision gets to be like looking through a small tunnel.  Interpretation of what is taken in through the eyes is also altered.  Dark spots on the floor are likely to be interpreted as holes a person could fall into.  An object could be right in front of a person and yet not be seen until pointed at.  One caregiver described a frightening morning when her husband had picked up his razor and his brain told him it was his toothbrush instead.  She caught him before he was injured.

The senses of hearing and smell are similarly affected.  It becomes impossible to focus on a conversation if there are other sounds in the room.  Smells like spoiled food or body odor may not be recognized.  It isn’t that the senses themselves are diminished, it is the brains ability to interpret what it is receiving that is failing.  We depend on our senses for safety.  When the senses begin to fail so does the ability to maintain personal safety.  Falling or eating spoiled food or any number of things could cause injury or illness.

Early on this journey I read, “While I Still Can” by Rick Phelps.  It said the three most important questions for caregivers are: Is he safe?  Is he pain free?  Is he content?  These give us goals in priority order.

I continue to use these three questions often.  It can be frustrating because being kept safe often conflicts with being content or happy.  The desire to be able to be left alone at home is strong, but if that is not safe then the unhappiness needs to be tolerated.  Safety is number one.  End of discussion.

The brain develops in stages.  Executive reasoning is a more recent part of the brain in humans.  Alzheimer’s attacks the newer formed sections of the brain first.  Decision making, and reasoning disappears early on.  The ability to perform complex tasks becomes more difficult.  The early part is more core survival and contains the automatic systems we don’t think about like breathing or swallowing or our heart beating.  Fight/flight/fright is also an early formed part of the brain.  In the final stages the ability to know when to breathe or when to swallow ceases to be automatic as those pathways are also lost.

Of special interest to my study was what happens to communication.  Teepa Snow is a teacher that has many YouTube videos.  She describes the brain as storing language on the left and rhythm on the right, and the left is lost while the right is retained.  Brain scans of dementia patients show the activity levels support this. 

There are a couple exceptions to language being stored on the left.  Words that are negatively charged because they shouldn’t be used are stored on the right.  That includes sexual talk, curse words, racial slurs, and any other ugly terms your Mom told you never to say in public.  These “special” words are retained while most other polite language stored on the left side disappears.  When a person with dementia uses these phrases, it is not showing that is who they really are.  It is not that they lost their filter and are displaying their true colors.  It is that the pathway to normal language has been lost and these are the words that are left.

The other language that is stored on the right is more of a gift.  Music, poetry, and prayer are also stored there.  That is why sometimes a person in the later stages of dementia lose the ability to speak but can still sing a favorite song.  The concert this afternoon by the O’Brien brothers is celebrating this truth.  When I was active as Klondike Kate we visited a nursing home and I moved close to a man while singing Sentimental Journey and he sang along.  His daughter beside him started crying softly.  Later she said that was the first time she had heard his voice in over a year.

Chit Chat is also mostly kept until near the very end.  You can talk simple pleasantries to a person with dementia and have no clue there is anything wrong.  As the condition progress the pathways to words, especially nouns, begins to deteriorate.  There are times the person knows what they want to say but the words can’t be found.  You and I run into this situation now and then and if you’re like me you find it frustrating.  Imagine if it were all day every day.  Teepa Snow teaches that approximately every fourth word might be lost while a person with dementia is attempting to listen to a conversation.  Can you just imagine how difficult and frustrating that could be for you?  It is hard to follow!

As the pathways to information are cut off retrieving information can become random.  If you ask a question, a person with dementia may go to their brain for the answer and find a phrase to reply so replies confidently.  It is a response, and the desire to communicate is strong so the response is given.  Quite often it isn’t valid.  It isn’t a lie.  There is no consciousness of attempting to mislead.  It is just confidently inaccurate because that’s what the brain delivered back to them.

There are good days and bad days, and this makes it hard to know just how much support a person needs.  If it is a good day then it is annoying to have someone attempt to do something for you that you can do yourself.  If it is a bad day, then tasks become frustrating and the world can become frightening.  A caregiver must be flexible.

The progression of the disease is not consistent.  The length of survival after diagnosis can be between 5 and 20 years with the average being 8 to 12 years.  Some people forget their loved one’s names and others keep those memories.  Some people wander, and others don’t.  Some become angry or violent, and others don’t.  There are many unknowns, and this is a stressful part of walking the dementia journey.

Therefore, it is not a journey to be taken alone.

I have heard the reading from 1 Corinthians at many weddings and often thought it was written specifically to instruct how a husband and wife should treat each other.

“Love is patient, love is kind, it isn't jealous, it doesn't brag, it isn't arrogant, it isn't rude, it doesn't seek its own advantage, it isn't irritable, it doesn't keep a record of complaints, it isn't happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”

It is not instruction to newlyweds.  It is instruction on how to treat members of your congregation.  It comes after the section of explaining how each of us has specific gifts like there are many parts of a human body.

12:27 You are the body of Christ and parts of each other.

These verses describe the ideal caregiver.  Patient, kind, not irritable, not keeping records of being wronged, never giving up, never losing faith, always hopeful, and enduring every circumstance.

I said in the beginning it is my hope to bring you a message of the power of caring, understanding, acceptance, love, and strength.

Caring comes first.  It is a spiritual gift, but I believe most humans have the ability at least at some level.  I hope my middle section gave you a better understanding of what dementia is and how it can affect a person.  Now comes my request for acceptance and love.

I am not a guest speaker from some faraway place.  We are members of this body of believers.  I know that there are others within our body that are on the dementia journey.  There are also others fighting different physical or mental challenges that need our care.  I said in the beginning that I am a primary caregiver, but we need to be surrounded by caring people.

Please be patient and kind.  Set expectations gently.  Don’t be afraid to enter conversation but be understanding.  Check out facts with me if you are going to be acting on them.  There is no intent to lie or insult or be inappropriate.  Do not keep records of being wronged.  Mistakes will be made.  Promises can’t always be kept.  As the disease progresses the person needs those beside them to replace all their senses as well as logic and reasoning to keep that first important question, “Are they safe?”, as a yes. 

I also chose one scripture from the lectionary today that spoke to me as I considered our journey.  It is what the children’s message was meant to support.  Dementia attacks the brain.  The brain is part of our body.  Our body is but a shell.  Within this shell lives the spirit of a child of God.

2Co 4:13 But we continue to preach because we have the same kind of faith the psalmist had when he said, “I believed in God, so I spoke.”

4:14 We know that God, who raised the Lord Jesus, will also raise us with Jesus and present us to himself together with you.

4:15 All of this is for your benefit. And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory.

4:16 That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day.

4:17 For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!

4:18 So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.

2Co 5:1 For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands.

Whether that tent is healthy or not does not diminish the fact we are children of God.  The value of the spirit within that shell remains constant.  The books on dementia often remind the caregiver that the person they love is still very much there.  They just can’t express themselves.   

This disease takes much away but it cannot touch this.  Our bodies are only a part of who we are on earth.  I can get sad that our retirement won’t include the experiences that I dreamed of, but that is focusing on the shell.  Scripture tells me there is joy to outweigh these troubles.

Alzheimer’s has no cure.  I see surviving Alzheimer’s not as extending life but as focusing on having the best life possible given the state of our earthly tent.  We can focus on what we have lost, or we can focus on what we have.  I choose the later.  I sang words before the message that embrace this thought.  We are up against a struggle.  Dreams have been shattered.  Fear and uncertainty are continually knocking at the door of my thoughts.  In all this I know God has claimed us both as his own.  We are children of the King.  We can live in joy despite it all.

I feel very blessed we are living in St. Croix County with all the supportive programs they provide.  I feel blessed that our church has people that are trained in the effects of the disease and I am proud that we hold the designation as Dementia Friendly.  I feel very blessed to have supportive friends and family.  Today I feel especially blessed that Rev Dawn gave me the opportunity to share our story with each of you.

I chose “Just As I Am” to follow the sermon.  As you sing the final four verses of this song I’d like you to view it a little differently.  We are the hands of Christ.  Put yourself in that spot and hear the members of this church singing it to you.  I come to you just as I am.  McQ comes to you just as he is.  Each of us come to this place bringing all kinds of shortcomings because this earthly experience brings them on.  Our response to each other can be a higher way if we listen to what Paul taught.  Caring comes first!

“Love is patient, love is kind, it isn't jealous, it doesn't brag, it isn't arrogant, it isn't rude, it doesn't seek its own advantage, it isn't irritable, it doesn't keep a record of complaints, it isn't happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”

Hold that in your thoughts.  Remember that the soul isn’t touched by any physical disease.  When you look at someone, no matter their physical condition, you are looking into the eyes of a child of God. 

We are a church for all generations.  The older generation will be faced with this disease in growing numbers.  Every 65 seconds a new person gets Alzheimer’s Dementia.  In this message (in 20 minutes 18.46, in 15 minutes 13.84) get it.  We need your caring, acceptance, and love for us.  I offer you my care, my acceptance, and my love in return.  I am committed to live lives of victory knowing at the end of the story God wins and we are his so that means we all win.  I call that surviving at its finest! 

Thank you for listening.

Amen